This is my cousin Jayden or "Dean" as he was more affectionally called. This guy was awesome! I miss him dearly and it is crazy to think that it has been a year since he passed.
Jayden had this way of loving you through his smile....this half sideways smirk that made your heart smile. He was pretty quite but that smirk spoke mountains to me. He was a talented photographer and a gentle soul.
on a side note when he passed gas you just about died.....hee hee especially the week at the cabin when all he was eating was teryaki beef jerky.
I miss Dean and it will be hard not having his sweet personality here to makes us grin, giggle, and laugh. But I know he is where he needs to be, being loved by God and by those other family members that had already left this life. and I know I will see him again.
And when I do I hope that our big cuddly Dean picks me up in his arms and squishes me to death. And I will squish him back just as hard.
I miss you Dean. Can't wait for our other adventures. Love you HEAPS.
xoxo
Kara-butt
And his loving sister wrote the following:
Just another day...
by Alyssa Rachelle Gardner on Thursday, October 13, 2011 at 1:02am.
The past year has had the worst of times and the best of times. October 13 was a day I was letting haunt me for the past month. Today, now a year ago, was the day my brother Jayden passed away at 16. I have never felt such pain or felt so alone in my life. It felt like all my joy and happiness had instantly left my body to never return.
Through the trials over this past year I have "learned" a couple things I wanted to share. I realized the importance and influence we have in eachothers lives even more than before. Those who were there to comfort and help my family and me really did make a difference. Another thing I often thought about was how important kindness and loving one another really is. When I returned to school I often would tear up a little whenever it seemed to be most inconvenient. I would sit on the bus thinking that no one around me knew what I was going through, and likewise I knew nothing about them. Finally the most important thing I am continually learning is how much the Lord blesses and loves me. Through the hard days and sleepless nights I always get through, things always work out, and there are always people around me that love me and care about me. I believe with all my heart that through hard times comes great strength, even when you feel you can't do it any more.
I miss Jayden and wish things could be different every day. I saw on tv this summer someone talking about the loss of a loved one and letting those hard days of a missed birthday or the first christmas control you. As I have thought about it more this past while I am determined to do the opposite. I want to remember the days when I lived at home and Jayden was wrestling with me until we would get in trouble. I want to remember him coming to my door and opening it with his head and peering in with his half grin which I know was his way of coming to say goodnight. I want to remember the good times we were able to spend together.
I KNOW I will see Jayden again. Its what brings peace when I feel like everything is pushing down on me. I want people to remember what a gentle and loving boy my brother was. He isn't very far, we just can't be together right now. Until then, I will continue to try and be the person I need, and want, to be.
.
by Alyssa Rachelle Gardner on Thursday, October 13, 2011 at 1:02am.
The past year has had the worst of times and the best of times. October 13 was a day I was letting haunt me for the past month. Today, now a year ago, was the day my brother Jayden passed away at 16. I have never felt such pain or felt so alone in my life. It felt like all my joy and happiness had instantly left my body to never return.
Through the trials over this past year I have "learned" a couple things I wanted to share. I realized the importance and influence we have in eachothers lives even more than before. Those who were there to comfort and help my family and me really did make a difference. Another thing I often thought about was how important kindness and loving one another really is. When I returned to school I often would tear up a little whenever it seemed to be most inconvenient. I would sit on the bus thinking that no one around me knew what I was going through, and likewise I knew nothing about them. Finally the most important thing I am continually learning is how much the Lord blesses and loves me. Through the hard days and sleepless nights I always get through, things always work out, and there are always people around me that love me and care about me. I believe with all my heart that through hard times comes great strength, even when you feel you can't do it any more.
I miss Jayden and wish things could be different every day. I saw on tv this summer someone talking about the loss of a loved one and letting those hard days of a missed birthday or the first christmas control you. As I have thought about it more this past while I am determined to do the opposite. I want to remember the days when I lived at home and Jayden was wrestling with me until we would get in trouble. I want to remember him coming to my door and opening it with his head and peering in with his half grin which I know was his way of coming to say goodnight. I want to remember the good times we were able to spend together.
I KNOW I will see Jayden again. Its what brings peace when I feel like everything is pushing down on me. I want people to remember what a gentle and loving boy my brother was. He isn't very far, we just can't be together right now. Until then, I will continue to try and be the person I need, and want, to be.
.
3 comments:
huge hugs to you all.
Thanks Kara for sharing. You are both amazing girls.
What a wonderful tribute to Jaden and a great expression of faith from both of you. He was a great guy and many many people miss him as well. You are a good example of keeping on.
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